Like so many people, I vowed not to get another dog, or at the very least, not for about 1 to 1-1/2 years after I had to help my 2 dogs of 17 years, cross over 5 months apart. They were my “boys” and my longest male relationship to date. Since I was single a lot of my time with them, they were my everything even more so. They were both sick the last year of their life too, so being single and having all the responsibility of their heavy care, was an exhausting and very sad time for me.
Well, I certainly was a big talker. I only lasted 14 days and I adopted my little Snickers. It was the coming home and not feeling the joyous fur and sloppy kisses of pure love. It was pure, cold emptiness. Like a vacuum had sucked all the love and joy out of the home. It was palatable. You could actually feel it physically.
During the 1st week with Snicker I thought looking at him, could I possibly love again to the same depth I did already with Corke, then Pj & Billi? He deserved that much and could I give it to him? I was still filled with grieve and pain from Pj & Billi crossing over. I didn’t want that kind of pain ever-ever again.
But, before a week was up, no one could have wrenched Snickers from my arms or my heart.
Corke, my little doggie angel who was murdered and who I actually got the animal communication gift from, said these words of wisdom to me and I hope it helps any of you feeling this kind of pain (Corke’s love and wisdom helped my heart heal and I hope it does yours)…
“Mom, stop looking down where I am no longer and crying. Please look up to me and smile, so I know you know I am here. I am here still. Smile to me momma, I am here!”
“Momma, you say you will never love another dog again because we go too soon and it’s too painful. There are so many more animals who need love, attention and help that people give them. If we lasted as long as you do, think of how many of us would never get saved or be loved at all. So love as many as you possibly can.”
They do understand we have to grieve, but when we feel the most heaviest grief, is when they are right near us. Our heart can tell they are there and that is why it hurts the most. They are our kids, our family, our soul mates, our best friends, our heroes – our everything.
So for our little angels looking down at us, we must look up and smile to them telling them we know they are there and loving as many as we possibly can.
To lighten the feeling a little with this hard on our hearts subject…my little Pj right after the vets gave him the shot to help him cross over, yelled at me from heaven, “Mom, stop crying over me!!! You know I am not there I am here!!!” He was bossy in life here and was still that way after crossing! 🙂
Love them all!
To my angels here and in heaven, I love you, I will always love you!
Dah Boys-PJ (left) & Billi (right)
Corke, my little angel